WTF: Oh The Horror! Part 3

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AN ACTOR’S RESUME CAN SOMETIMES LOOK A LITTLE SCARY

 

Finely, I am proud to present to you, WTF (What the Friday): Oh The Horror! Part Three. It’s about time! Where have you been? Oh, life, love, and the pursuit of a paycheck sometimes tend to get in the way. But now I’m back and better than ever! Or, at least as good as I was before, for whatever that’s worth. Since the publishing of the previous posts in this series, enough time has passed for Wolverine to grow a decent pair of muttonchops; so if you missed the horror of the talented entries from parts one and two, just click the different looking text here or here to get caught up. Or, if you just prefer to continue moving forward, here’s a brief synopsis of what’s going on: Continue reading

WTF: Oh The Horror! Part 2

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AN ACTOR’S RESUME CAN SOMETIMES LOOK A LITTLE SCARY

Welcome to part two of WTF (What the Friday): Oh The Horror! What is this? What’s going on? I feel awkward and out of the loop! Fear not my dear readers. If you missed the horror of the talented entries from part one, just click this here link to get yourself all caught up. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

All better? Excellent! Below is the series synopsis that I totally plagiarized from part one because, well I was just too damn lazy to write something new.

“In the past the horror genre was always viewed as the red-headed stepchild of the film industry. Slasher films, movie monsters, and scream queens have generally brought upon snickers and down-the-nose glances from Hollywood’s elite. It wasn’t until the unprecedented success of Silence of the Lambs in 1991 that it became fashionable to take on a flick that goes bump in the night. But the truth is, the who’s who of Hollywood have been landing roles in horror long before it was trendy to terrify.”

And so we continue a three part series showcasing the scary work of some of today’s biggest names in cinema. Some of these films you may have heard of and some will just downright surprise you. Here are the next seventeen entries. Continue reading

The Shitfest Social 2: The Moleman of Belmont Avenue

What happens when you get some of the craziest film bloggers from around the world together to watch a really crappy movie? Why it’s a Shitfest Social of course! How does it work? A poor, unsuspecting film is chosen and a date and time is agreed upon. When said date and time arrives, we all press play and unleash comment hell. Think MST3K, internet style. Continue reading

WTF: Oh The Horror!

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AN ACTOR’S RESUME CAN SOMETIMES LOOK A LITTLE SCARY

In the past the horror genre was always viewed as the red-headed stepchild of the film industry. Slasher films, movie monsters, and scream queens have generally brought upon snickers and down-the-nose glances from Hollywood’s elite. It wasn’t until the unprecedented success of Silence of the Lambs in 1991 that it became fashionable to take on a flick that goes bump in the night. But the truth is, the who’s who of Hollywood have been landing roles in horror long before it was trendy to terrify.

And so begins a three part series showcasing the scary work of some of today’s biggest names in cinema. Some of these films you may have heard of and some will just downright surprise you. We begin with the first seventeen. Continue reading

WTF: Scary or Die

Welcome to the second installment of What the Friday, showcasing some of the craziest films the horror genre has to offer. This Friday’s offering is 2012’s, Scary or Die. In retrospect, given the choice, I’ll take die.

 

scary_or_dieScary or Die(2012)

Genre: Horror
Country: US
Director: Bob Badway, Michael Emanuel, Igor Meglic
Stars: Domiziano Arcangeli, Corbin Bleu, Shannon Bobo

Well, this was just terrible. And not in that, “This will be fun to sit around and rip apart with friends” kind of terrible, but a huge monkey fling of a poop terrible. Yet another anthology film in the vein of V/H/S and The ABCs of Death, Scary or Die showcases five short stories that they forgot to make scary, and appear to have the production value of $12.50 and a gift card to Applebee’s. The shorts are linked together by a woman viewing each of them on a website called Scary or Die.

Continue reading

WTF: Trailer Park of Terror

I love a good horror film. I also find joy in really bad horror films. Therefore I present to you a new segment called WTF (What The Friday), where each Friday I will showcase a particularly horror-ble film. Most of these offerings will be of the so-bad-it’s-good variety, but some will be just plain terrible, in which case I will have suffered the 90 minutes for you and your cinematic sanity can stay intact (look at me taking one for the team).

May I present to you 2008’s Trailer Park of Terror. A high production value wasn’t enough to save this film full of gaping plot holes and goofy, clichéd characters. However, the rampage of ridiculousness and several crazy kills was just enough to make this a gleeful guilty pleasure. Continue reading

Let the Right One In: This Should Apply to Your Choice in Movies as Well

let_the_right_one_inLet the Right One In (2008)

Genre: Horror
Country: Sweden
Director: Tomas Alfredson
Stars: Kåre Hedebrant, Lina Leandersson, Per Ragnar

Based on a novel of the same name by John Ajvide Lindqvist (who also adapted the screenplay), Let the Right One In is not your typical vampire tale. First of all, nobody in this film “sparkles”, so that’s already a step in the right direction. At its very core, this film is a love story between two individuals desperate to be accepted for who they are. Continue reading

Joy Ride: Postcards From A Thriller’s Edge

joy_rideJoy Ride (2001)

Genre: Thriller | Horror
Country: US
Director: John Dahl
Stars: Paul Walker, Steve Zahn, Leelee Sobieski

I have always been captivated by travel. The whine and hum of spinning tires, like a siren’s song the open road seduces me to dance upon her weathered blacktop. Alone or with friends, for a weekend or two weeks, there is nothing like the adventure and promise of a road trip. Even my taste in literature tends to center around tales of travel. Jack Kerouac’s classic, On the Road, and Will Ferguson’s Hitching Rides with Buddha are two of my favorite books. So it’s no surprise that a movie such as Joy Ride has found its way into my list of offerings. Continue reading

Behind The Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon – Yeah it’s a girls name, wanna make something of it?

behind_the_maskBehind The Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006)

Genre: Comedy | Horror
Country: US
Director: Scott Glosserman
Stars: Nathan Baesel, Angela Goethals, Scott Wilson, Robert Englund

Imagine if you will a world where all the maniac psycho killers from your favorite horror flicks, are real. Where places and towns such as Crystal Lake, Springwood, and Haddonfield all exist, permanently scarred by horrific catastrophe and loss from the likes of Jason, Freddy, and Michael respectively. And now Glenn Echo appears to be earmarked to earn its membership in the growing list of tragedy towns by up-and-coming serial slasher, Leslie Vernon (Nathan Baesel).  Continue reading

Eraserhead: Who hurt you David Lynch?

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Genre: Horror | Fantasy
Country: US
Director: David Lynch
Stars: Jack Nance, Charlotte Stewart, Allen Joseph

This film arrived at the threshold of my mind in a flaming brown paper bag, the remnants of which I am still trying to scrape off the bottom of my shoe. Its metaphorical, visual stench permeated my clothing and hair and left a burning trace of bile in the back of my throat. Eraserhead is the most appalling film I will ever encourage everyone to see. Except my Mother. I love my Mother and would never subject her to such things. Continue reading